Thursday, February 24, 2011

CUSTOMER "SERVICE" ASSISTANCE . . . NOT!

This is a true story.  You probably already know that truth IS stranger than fiction, and my story will add credence to that proverb.  I  could not have come up with a fictional scenario any more absurd than this one was.

I used to sell regularly on ebay, so my brother and wife brought a new pressure cooker to me for selling on there several years ago.

We couldn't find the size of the pressure cooker which was needed for my ebay listing.  This information was neither on the cooker itself nor in the original instruction book that came with the cooker, if you can believe that.  I went online to the XX cooker website (name omitted to protect the guilty), but that model number was not listed on their site, either.  So, I emailed their customer service department.  I have kept my emails, along with their replies, and I still laugh out loud when reading them.

Below are the actual, unedited email messages to and from the XX Company's customer service department.  Needless to say, I was a bit annoyed by the time I sent that final message to them! 


*   *   *   *   *   *   *   *
To Customer Service

To Whom It May Concern:
Someone gave me one of your pressure cooker/canners, model #xxxx. I could not find it on your website, and the instruction book that came with it does not say if it is a 4 qt. or a 6 qt. size.  The size is not on the cooker, either.

Can you email me what size this cooker is? Thank you very much.
Mavis Hinton
-------------------------------------------------
From: cs@XXgeneralstore.com
To: mavishinton
Subject: Re: XX Cooker/Canner #xxxxx

72338 Recipe/Instruction Book is the one that you need

---------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Customer Service:
No, I don't need the instruction book; one came with the cooker, but it does not state the size of the cooker. I simply want to know what size the cooker is--4 qt. or 6 qt. Thank you.
Mavis Hinton

---------------------------------------------------------------
 From: cs@XXgeneralstore.com
 To: mavishinton
 Subject: Re: XX Cooker/Canner #xxxx
 I am not sure you can fill it with quarts of water whatever fills it  till its getting ready to run over is the quart size of the cooker
 Thank you
 Customer service
--------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Customer Service:

 Yes, I have the ability and intelligence to fill the cooker with water. However, I just want to go on record stating that as a customer service, your company does not seem to be very willing to  assist with very simple questions.

You could have spent one minute, taken a catalog off the shelf, and looked up the model number I mentioned and simply TELL ME the size of  the cooker. Directing a customer to fill the new cooker with water to determine its size is ridiculous.

Thanks for not helping,
Mavis Hinton

*   *   *   *   *
Note:  We finally did resort to filling the cooker with water, which we could have done in the first place (had we thought of it initially), but ended up in a laugh fest while doing so.

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

"SIGNS" OF THE TIMES

As you travel along America's highways, does your eagle eye notice those grammatical errors on signs?  I must admit that mine does, quite often. 

Check these out:


Remove that apostrophe!



















"Bye bye" to sales?





















Sunday, February 20, 2011

VOCABULARY AND VERBOSITY: ARE YOU UP TO IT?

This is a test about vocabulary and verbosity. Can you rephrase these verbose proverbs to their original wording?  I managed to get them all after a little head scratching.

(Answers are given at the end, but no peeking until you try to figure these out!)

1. Members of an avian species of identical plumage congregate.

2. Scintillate, scintillate, steroid minific.

3. Surveillance should precede saltation.

4. Neophyte's serendipity.

5. Pulchritude possesses solely cutaneous profundity.

Saturday, February 19, 2011

ABOUT THOSE CATS: MY FAIRNESS DOCTRINE

Piper, who belongs
to Shadow's family
Although I write books and stories from a dachshund's viewpoint, many friends are cat lovers.  I have owned cats, so I really have nothing against them--I just happen to like and understand dogs more.  My doxie Duke regularly plays with Piper, who gets the best of him most of the time, but Duke keeps coming back for more, anyway!  Therefore, in the interest of fairness, I have included this post about feline behavior.

The cartoons below just seemed to characterize so well the various actions, a.k.a. contortions, that cats have in their repertoire, and I've seen actually such in real cats.  My personal favorite is the last one on the right.  Which of them do you like the best?


Friday, February 18, 2011

"MANY A TRUTH IS SAID IN JEST"

The humorous church signs below, on the surface, anyway, are meant to be taken . . .well, humorously. However, since "many a truth is said in jest,"  their message comes through very clear and very true: 






























Thursday, February 17, 2011

CARTOONS FOR PERCEPTIVE MINDS: A.K.A. VISUAL PUNS

I am sharing these cartoons because I love puns--especially visual puns. 






Saturday, February 12, 2011

VALENTINE'S DAY? BAH, HUMBUG!

Call me the Scrooge of Valentine's Day.  Declare that I'm lacking something.   Wait!  I'm not against love and giving gifts; I'm just against all the over-the-top hoopla for Valentine's Day.

I plan on giving my hubby a gift for Valentine's Day, and he'll give me one, too.  TV commercials suggest giving pajamas, teddy bears, and the usual chocolates and/or flowers.  All of those are just fine, but why limit "it" to one day a year?  I mean, shouldn't we demonstrate our love in ways other than just candy, flowers, or the like?  True love is with you at your worst moment, worst illness, worst event, and even your worst behavior.  There isn't anything superficial about true love. 

Do  you know the best Valentine's Day gift I ever received?  Decades ago when my hubby was in college, we didn't have money to buy each other anything for Valentine's Day.  For my present, he washed, waxed, and detailed our one car for me.  He spent hours doing that, and it was done out of love.

The Bible puts it this way:  "Love is patient, love is kind.  It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.  It is not rude, it is not self-seeking:  it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.  Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.  Love never fails."  (I Corinthians 13:4-8a NIV)

I always want to display that kind of love to my family and friends.  I fail sometimes, as we all do, but what a wonderful example the Bible gives us to follow!  I wish each of you a Valentine's day filled with blessings, joy, and fulfillment.

Saturday, February 5, 2011

CUTE OVERLOAD: DACHSHUND PUPPY TAKING A BATH

http://cuteoverload.com/2011/02/01/this-just-in-prosh-dachshund-takes-a-bath-in-slo-mo/


Click on the link above for a dose of over-the-top cuteness! 

You absolutely HAVE to view this adorable (and brief) video of this dachshund puppy leisurely taking a bath.  It certainly made my day and brought a smile to my face.

Unlike our two doxies, Duke and Shadow, he truly seems to relish his bath time rather than endure it as they do.

Enjoy!

Thursday, February 3, 2011

I WANT TO BE A LOSER!

"Now, I'm not assuming that anyone out there is even the teeniest bit interested in my weight loss, but, my dear readers, this post is for MY benefit :)." 

This post will chronicle my weight loss (see yesterday's post before reading further).  I'm not ready yet to say what I weigh or how much I want/need to lose (these have always been my closely-guarded secrets, and will remain so until I lose an appreciable percentage of the body fat destined to be gone).  I've never minded stating my age, however; will that suffice?  I'm 63.

Seeing my weight loss in black and white (well, burgundy, actually) keeps me motivated.  And, I realize that there will be times when I won't lose as quickly--or at all.  That's just the way it works.  No wailing or gnashing of teeth if I don't lose on a weigh-in day; I'll just keep on eating properly and use my tape measure to check inches lost!  If you do follow my chronicle, I don't mind, since I have put it on here.  Perhaps my journey will encourage a fellow dieter along the way :).

NOTE:  All weight loss entries are in pounds and/or inches, giving the total to date rather than the loss that day.  You can easily determine the pounds lost on each date if you are so inclined.

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

TO DIET OR NOT TO DIET . . .

"I have probably lost enough weight in my life to represent a grown, muscle-bound man walking around out there somewhere."

 I warn you at the outset of this post that I am going to write about yet another diet journey--mine.  I will get rather personal, detailing my yo-yo weight loss over the years, gaining it back, declaring that I would NEVER gain weight back again, gaining weight back . . . and now:  I MEAN IT THIS TIME.  And of course, there's that verse in Scripture:  "So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God"  (I Corinthians 10:31 NIV).  As a Christian, I simply cannot reconcile being overweight with glorifying God, especially when being overweight is from eating incorrectly, not from a different health problem itself.

I have tried all sorts of diets, too--but I won't mention those failures here, because those diet clubs, systems, special foods, etc., were not at fault--I WAS.  After all, nobody held me down, tied my hands behind my back, and force-fed me, did they?  Nope.  The one thing I can totally control in my life, that of choosing what food to put into my mouth, I didn't control at all.  No excuses.  Not a leg to stand on.  No reasons that are valid.

Dachshund Books for Dog Lovers!

Dachshund Books for Dog Lovers!
Click on the BOOKS tab at the top of this blog

Write a Review!

Write a Review!
Go to www.amazon.com/author/mavisdukehinton