"CONVERSATION" WITH DUKE

Look at that doxie face! Can you tell that Duke was
NOT happy that he'd just had a bath?? LOL

I typed "conversation" in quotes in the post title, because it was mostly one sided on my part, of course. Oh, Duke was brilliant, but not even he could speak human. But . . . he could communicate with his eyes, his body language, his facial expressions, and especially his barks and sounds. You know exactly what I mean, doxie lovers.

We took Duke to the veterinarian hospital on Monday, July 24, so this "conversation" must have taken place a few days prior, between what we thought was just an upset tummy and the obvious signs that he needed to be taken to the hospital pronto. Therefore, it probably Wednesday or Thursday of the previous week.  I don't know why I feel that I must pinpoint the date, but it seems important to me.

He was sitting on my lap, as he often did, and he obviously didn't feel very good. After he had thrown up his breakfast of dog food and a little scrambled egg that morning, he just lay around, acted tired,

and we had to coax him to go out. His low blood platelet count had already begun well before that, unbeknownst to us then. That day, he had positioned himself so he could see out the front windows of our living room, because he was as nosy as any neighborhood gossip ever was! He was always on the lookout for cars on our street, especially the mailman. Also squirrels, cats, rabbits, humans, leaves--you name it. I often said he'd bark at a speck of dust dancing in the air.


But I digress. As he sat in my lap, having propped himself up on the arm of my recliner, I felt sad for him. He looked unwell, and it was more than an upset tummy. I said, "Dukie, you are such a good boy, you know. Feel better so you can go outside and chase those squirrels you see out there." He perked up and barked, but didn't want to go outside as he usually did when one of those keywords set him off. I continued: "We love you so much." Turning his head, he looked at me, wagging his tail. For some inexplicable reason, the tears began rolling down my face. He licked my hand. He always did that to reassure his humans that "everything is gonna be okay." But it didn't work--I had a feeling in my heart that he wasn't going to be all right.

When I could, I continued talking to him, repeating myself: "Dukie, I love you so much, and I don't want you to leave us yet. Please don't get sicker. Stay here with us a few more years. We have so many more good times ahead of us. You make life so much fun." He he was watching me as I spoke. I knew my voice was full of emotion and pain, and I felt silly. I didn't know, at least factually, that anything else was wrong with him, other than my gut feeling.

"Remember when we picked you out of all those other doxies when you were a little puppy?" (Of course he didn't.) "You were the only little black-and-tan male

Eight weeks old: the day we
brought him home

puppy they had, and I wanted one like Shadow." His ears perked up again, because he remembered his buddy well. "You came home with us as a scared little puppy, but it didn't take you long to run this place, did it?" I smiled. He looked at me as I stopped speaking, and he "boofed" softly. He was telling me "Yes, Mom. I remember." I rubbed his ears.

On the following Monday, he became so sick that our vet made arrangements for us to take him to the veterinary hospital, and he never came home again.


As I think about this scenario, am I reading too much into it? Perhaps, but it was preparing me to face the reality that was soon to come.

The softness of his ears, the shine of his coat, and the coldness of his doggie nose--those finite things are the memories I draw upon, both now and in the future. Duke was special (we all say that about our fur babies, don't we?), and he gave us unconditional love for those years we were blessed to share with him. That love was a priceless gift.

Duke loved looking out the front door to watch the world go by

I'll close with the words from Papa Duke, one of the main characters in I AM SARGE:

"A dawg loves you no matter what. You can be ugly, old, even dumb--but a dawg don't care. All he wants is your love and some food now and then. I think that's why God created them, to show that to us."